What I Learned dcook

After spending time with the resdients of the retirement center I learned a avery imporant lesson. That leson was that no matter whatage or stage in life I may be at you can always find youthful joy and happiness in life. For some of the residents that I encountered it was Rummikub that they found a brief moment of joy in. Some had played rummikub in their somewhat earlier years and this served as a gateway that allowed them to travel back to the days of their youth and vibrance. Although it is wuite a different story now that thye have aged and heir bodies can no longer do some of the things that they were used to doing in their earlier years they are able to somewhat enjoy what they once had in the game of Rummiub and gain a sort of peace. I discovered that this is something I need to apply in my own life. In the times that I find myself in dark and infamiliar situations I can always think back to times of happiness and joy and make the best of any sitaution and any circumstance.

Prior Thoughts to Time Spent. dcook

Before I started spending time at the Due West Retirement Center I had soem preconceived notions about what it would be like spending time with retired elderly people. I assumed first of all that it was going to be a very awkward experience for me and even for some of the residents that I migt encounter while being there. Now it was sometimes awkward for me and I am sure it was for them but i learned that if you find a way to relate to soemone they will accept you for what you appear to them to be. Although I was just a college kid assigned to serve and spend time with a group of elderly people I was able to relate through games they played (Rummikub). Another preconceived notion I had was that spending time there would be no fun for me at all. Being the grandon of a retirement center resident back home I have often visied retirement centers and for me they have always been the archetypal symbol for sadness and loneliness. I cam to learn that within those walls is a small community of older folks who find anyway they can to have a little fun even though their age may restrict what they can and cannot do. Even though it is depressing to think of the somewhat lonely life that these folks posses it is clear that I myself had a good time playing rummikub and learning anew game with some elderly counterparts.

field notes 4 dcook

On this day i returned to th Due West Retirement Center determined to improve my new found obsession in Rumikub. Although they only play certain days at 3 o' clock I had spent some time over the week looking up diffeent strategies and different plays that could procure a victory. The first couple rounds of the game I realized that all the startegy and and game plans that I had eveloped were sudenly useless. General Patton, I believe once said, " No battle plan survives contact contact with the enemy." He could not have hit the nail on the head any harder than he did. I spent all that time deeloping a point of attack and plan to thwart my elderly counterparts but all that preparatin was nullified by the experience my fellow rummikub players possessed. I played for quite some time that day but left once again defeated but with a better understanding of what these rsidents use their time doing at the center. They may be cut off from the rest of the world but in the center they have to make due with what they have and have as much fun as they can even though they may never get a visit or call froma family member.

Field Notes Day 3 dcook

On this the tird day that I visited the retirement center I became familiar with a practice that is known and many enjoy within the retirement center and that tradition of pride and competition is rummikub. The game of rummikub is a somewhat complicated game. I was invited to join after observing a certain board game being played by several residents. I had never played nor heard of the game but the residents were avid on teaching me and introducing me to the world of Rummikub. I will not go into a great detail about the game but suffice it to say that I am not the world's greatest rummikub player, in fact i downright stunk. I will say this though, this is more to show how good these players really are, at the end of a round the tiles on everyone's racks are added up, the three players who did not declare rummikub and essentially vistory get that added number subtracted fromm their score but the victor gets the total negative number of all three players added to his own score. The very first round that I played went something like this...my score was negative 33 the other two round loser's scores were negative 3 and negative 1 with the winner possessing a score of positie 37. Needless to say i was both somewhat embarrassed and astounded at how these residents had perfected both their rumikub play and startegy. I left "with my tail between my legs," but determined to come back the next day that they would play.

Field Notes Day 2 dcook

On the second day that I went to the retirement center I spent a little time just trying to find something useful to do. I sat down for a brief time in the sun room trying to get on a more common level with some of the residents. I chatted with several elderly ladies talking more about what is going on outside in the world rather than what is happening inside of the center. I discovered from these two ladies that the residents are somewhat shut out from the rest of the world although some own and watch their own televisions. They also seemed very intrigued with the happenings of the college right down the road so i shared some of the many stories that I have gained by living at Erskine. After staying a while longer talking with a few more elderly residents, just visiting and conversing, I left.

Field Notes Day 1 dcook

My first experience at the Due West Retirement Center consisted mainly of walking through the entire facility. By walking through I was able to become awafre of the type of enviroment that the Due West Retirement Center possesses. My "tour guide" led me through the halls and introduced me to some very interesting characters. I met one man who was a world war 2 veteran, and another woman who was involved in newspapers and even taught for a short time in Egypt. I soon realized that any preconceived notions I might have had about working and spending time at the center might soon be put to the test as the first two people i met had led interestng lives prior to their stay at the center itself. These were two of my more memorable encounters and after that I did not remember many more faces but I am sure that on my next visit things wil become considerably more interesing.

Field Notes Six.DHudSmith

I truly enjoyed my service today.

First, I was conscripted to the task of giving the Bible study. I was grateful for the opportunity. I started by reading from the book that they take all of their studies from. I think it was written for the elderly. I thought it was good. Maybe a bit shallow. Afterwards we read from Jeremiah a passage that I had recently read. It actually fit together pretty well. I stated my thoughts. Several of the ladies (no men) had something to say about it. Then, we were finished. The whole experience was a bit strange. As I read and spoke, I looked out into the OPs faces. Many of the faces were blank. They were not present. Despite my attempt to be loud, I do not think that everyone could hear me. There were two, however, clearly with me. The rest...who knows.

I met a nice lady walking up and down the ramp (a form of exercise which they are allowed to preform solo). At first, she seemed distant. Understandable. To her I was just some random youngin. However, after I told her who I was and why I was there, she treated me as if I were her own grandson. We walked up and down the ramp four times (spending more time than you might expect). She was surprisingly tall. Had she not been slouched with age, she may have been my height. She was so grateful for my company.

Prior Thoughts Six.DhudSmith

This is the last official OP visit. Today, I go with no expectations. I just go. Ive stopped debating what I will do, for I know I will be put to something. God knows what will happen.

Field Notes Five.DHudSmith

Apart from my routine OP visits, I spent some time in the lobby talking to whomever wished to talk. I met some very fine old ladies, two of them. I was sitting in a chair between them. Neither of them could hear well enough to know that the other was talking to me. This created a strange situation as a tried to listen and reciprocate to two completely separate and simultaneous conversations. I do not multi-task very well, and I cannot remember the nature of either discussion. I think one of the ladies eventually took offense at my failure to keep up because she left rather promptly. The other lady didn't seem to mind. She carried the strangest story-telling mode. She would start a story which would, in turn, remind her of another story. Without any notification, she would transition into that tangent story which, like the first story, would remind her of some other tale. I believe that this endless chain would have continued forever had I not left. She wants to play Rummy-Cube (I guess thats how you spell it...). Maybe we will.

After finish my conversation with the chain-story-teller, I went to the room of the lady who was miffed at my lack of ability in carrying on two sided conversations. I wanted to apologize, for to her, I am sure my neglect was unjustified. Apparently, she is blind, or at least mostly so. I offered to read her her letters. She assented but said that she didn't have any letters to read today. She didn't have anything else she wanted to read. I wanted very much to read her something. This is a literary project, and I love to read. If I went blind, I would beg people to read to me.

Prior Thoughts Five.DhudSmith

Two hours seems like such a long time. I feel like I am out of touch with the true nature of service. I hope that this will change. Service should grow naturally out from the man saved by Grace. I am selfish. I hope to have the heart to serve when this project is complete. That is the true nature of service. Yet, if I do serve when this project is complete, I want my motive to be grounded in gratitude rather than acceptance. I cannot gain by service any acceptance from God. Christ gained my full acceptance.

Field Notes Four.DHudSmith

The visit went well today. I played dominoes again and walked the newspaper lady again. She has lots of opinions. Many of which, I agree with. Out of all the people I have spent time with, she keeps in touch with he outside world the most.

I also spoke with the veteran. The poor man. He is a new resident and is having a difficult time adjusting. He compares living at the retirement center with being in prison. Dismal. I tried to encourage him, and I think he enjoys my company. Perhaps he is just melodramatic, for he smiled a great deal. He does not look healthy, however. I believe he looks worse now than he did two weeks ago. I wonder how long he has.

I have a tendency to talk to these people as if they were children. They are not, however. In fact, they are far more mature than I am. They may have slowed minds and dulled senses, but they are wise. And that is true maturity. Their simple wisdom sheds light on the futility of my vanity. I, a youth, am humbled by the old and weak.

Prior Thoughts Four.DHudSmith

I may be falling into a rut. I know which OPs will be most receptive to my attention and most willing to help and those who will not want to talk to me. I want to spend time with those who will accept my attention. It is simply less awkward. But, I suspect that those who will not accept my attention are those who need it most. A strange balance. We will see what happens. To the retirement center I go!

Field Notes Three.DHudSmith

I only met with two OPs today.

The first was the man who reads all the large-text books. Today we played dominoes. We played lots of dominoes. I'm not sure how dominoes relates to a literary project. Perhaps it doesn't. It was fun, however, and he was grateful for the company. He can be very funny. When I would score or do well, he would say, "Gee Wiz". He does not care whether he wins or loses. He just likes to play. He says he likes dominoes because you don't have to be involved with the other player. You can be thinking about whatever you like in your mind and still function in the game.

Secondly, I again visited the newspaper lady, and again, I read her the newspaper. We also went outside for a walk. The residents are not allowed to go on walks by themselves, and her doctor told her she needed to walk. So, we walked. I must say (and I usually wouldn't)that she looked adorable. She must be less than five feet tall and, in her hat and sweater, she looked very cute. She is probably the most pleasant OP I have ever met.

Field Notes Five. mbusch

The visit to the retirement home went really well today. I did a devotion on praise and thanksgiving, and finished with "Amazing Grace" and Thanksgiving trivia. I had many resident tell me they enjoyed and appreciated it. So I'm thankful my prayers were answered.

Field Notes Four. mbusch

Today when I went over, I wasn't exactly sure what to do. I arrived at the retirment center and went into the Carlisle Nursing Center, where I usually go. I didn't know quite how I would be recieved because it wasn't my normal time to go over, but the director smiled at me and just asked me to sit with one of the male residents. In all honesty, this is the one person in the center with whom I could talk for hours. This man faught in WWII, and I would love to talk to him about it. I can't talk with him easily because there are times when he is very difficult to understand. Today, I just sat with him, making small talk, when he reached out and just grabbed my hand. It was a simple gesture that people have done before, but I could almost interpret the move. He enjoyed me sitting with him, listening to him, talking with him. It melted my heart.

The music afterward went well. We didn't sing as well as we are capable, but I believe that it was enjoyed by the residents. Dr. Jeffreys asked us to mingle and visit with the residents after we were finished, and I believe they appreciated that as well.

Prior Thoughts Four. mbusch

I'm heading over to the retirment center in a few moments. I'm really excited about this vist because Women's Chorale (which I'm a part of) is going to sing later this afternoon. I'm heading over earlier to visit with the residents a little before we start singing. I'm really glad to get the chance to do this because almost every time I go over, I'm asked to play the piano. (I almost did a few times, but managed to save myself the embarassment at the last minute.) Finally the residents will get to hear some of the music they seem to crave.

Field Notes Three. mbusch

My third visit was almost identical to the first.I arrive there around 10, in time to visit with the residents before their 10:30 bible study. Once again, I conducted the devotion by reading from the Bible, the devoltion booklet they have, praying for any needs they tell me about, and singing a few hymns. What scared me is when I was asked to lead the devotion next Wed. It's a very short, and very simple reading, but it makes me nervous. I'm no longer afraid of what the residents think about having me there, what scares me are the nurses and caretakers who sit in the chairs behind the lobby and listen/talk through the devotion. It makes me think of the DC Talk song, "What if I stumble, what if I fall, what if I loose my step and I make fools of us all". I don't know how to put into words the apprehension I have about the devotion, I can only pray that God takes my fallible words and tranforms them for His glory.

Field Notes Six.edevault

My last day at the retirement center wasn't unusual in the least--just the same old routine.

I read some poetry to the Carlisle residents in their T.V. room/den/dining room. I asked if anyone had a "poet preference"; one woman requested Longfellow. This same woman commented that her mother would read them "The Song of Hiawatha" and even made them memorize parts of it. After each poem I read, this woman would give a generous "thank you! thank you!". Quite endearing.

I then visited the Wylie center--particularly Ms. Co. I continued to read John (we left off on chapter 16). Around chapter 17 Ms. Co.'s daughter called; I could hear her voice on the phone saying, "Hey Mama--how are you?" They talked for some time; the daughter voice sounded kind. I envisioned her face; I imagine she looks like her mother.

I finished John and decided to read both Titus and Philemon (which took little time). After that, I told Ms. Co. that I would not be able to volunteer often due to the late-semester rush. Unfortunately, time is limited.

She seemed receptive, and told how much she has enjoyed my reading. I agreed, and said that reading to her has benefitted me as well. I clasped her hand, bid her good morning, and wished her well.

I pray my volunteering has profited someone and has been a good service.

Elizabeth

Prior Thoughts Six.edevault

Today I will visit the retirement center for the last time (atleast for this project). I mentioned before my thoughts on how I should...well, leave the residents I have been visiting regularly. Especially in regard to Ms. Co., who I've been reading the Bible to for some time now.

I'll be fitting in these last hours in the morning after HS 101--quite a rush, but...I'll live.

Elizabeth